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Mozambique: Summary of Venâncio Mondlane December 16th Communication

Animal Farm African Version by Mondlane

Mozambique: Summary of Venâncio Mondlane December 16th Communication

Mozambique: Summary of Venâncio Mondlane December 16th Communication

Well, at the least this revolutionary can write. Or it seems. Or was this list hashed up around a big table with loud voices and zero consideration for the important things in life? Like Xmas and New Year? Fuel and water? Peace and harmony? A functioning country?

For it won’t be long before the whole country implodes into reckless violence if Mondlane and Chapo carry on like the idiots that they are right now. I know one of them personally and can tell you right now, he is an absolute moron. Powers of deduction lead me to believe the same about the other.

My newest favourite quote…

“What good has any revolutionary ever achieved?” – A Wise Woman

Revolutionary achievements? Che Guevara? He was simply killed by the CIA and achieved absolutely nothing except made it onto many t-shirts later on in life. Mandela? Well, look at his legacy. Machel? Well…look at ’em go!

All any revolutionary wants is what the others have. And so they revolt. Their revolting behaviour (if bloody enough) puts them in the pound seat. And new revolutionaries pop up wanting that same seat. And so they start acting revolting too (terrorism, strikes and protests) and the cycle continues.

The Announcement

Over to Idiot Number One…or Two, I can’t quite work it out…but his name is Mondlane…and this is what he managed to scribble together yesterday…

  1. Given the damage caused in Cabo Delgado by cyclone Chido, this week will be a week of solidarity and therefore there will be no drastic measures
  2. This week will be a week of mourning and will last 4 days, from Thursday to Sunday. Thursday is the 19th and will mark 2 months since the deaths of Elvino Dias and Paulo Gwambe and therefore this week will also be a week of celebration of the heroes of modern Mozambican democracy.
  3. During these 4 days, all activities must take place normally, without demonstrations, but people must dress in black, if that is their mourning tradition, or in white if that is their tradition. And from 1:00 pm to 1:15 pm daily, there must be a break to sing the national anthem and pray.
  4. From Friday to Sunday, prayers for justice in Mozambique must be held in mosques/churches/temples
  5. On Sunday, December 22nd, the day before the results will be announced by the Constitutional Council, there must be vuvuzelas and whistles from 9pm to 10pm.
    6.On Monday, December 23rd, all activity and movement must stop across the country to hear the reading of the Constitutional Council’s Judgment. However, the movement of health personnel, lawyers and patients must be allowed.
  6. The Turbo V8 period will be announced on December 23rd by the words the Chair of the Constitutional Council will choose to read. She will have to decide between the electoral truth and the electoral lie, which will determine whether the future will be one of peace or chaos. All responsibility for the country’s future will be in the hands of the 7 members of the Constitutional Council.
  7. Until January 15th, the day Venâncio Mondlane takes office as President of the Republic of Mozambique, the collection of all tolls, all logging and mining operations, and the collection of customs duties from informal cross-border female traders must be suspended.

(is that straight out of Orwell or what? – Sean)

And now Idiot Number Two – Chapo…

“I want to be the president for all Mozambicans, united from Rovuma to Maputo. Let us engage in dialogue, in conversation. It is not through street protests that Mozambique develops but through peace, dialogue, harmony, security, and conversation. We are open to any Mozambican who has an idea to contribute to our country” – Presidential Speech Writer for Daniel Chapo (Frelimo).

For I have met a presidential speech writer—a little creep from England. He was working for Zuma as his speechwriter at the time. And told me that Zuma had to practise over and over to get his speeches right. Our little creepy speech writer would have to simplify and simplify until Zuma got it easy enough to read out loud. Speech writer for a political party. How soul-less could you ever be in your life?

These people (Mondlane, Chapo, Zuma, Ramaphosa etc…) are not near the levels that normal governments operate at. They are a mentally retarded and even more sick version of the pigs in “Animal Farm” by George Orwell. And the sheeple, well all they can do is scream and shout (Toyi-toyi in South Africa) since their education is so low, due to total neglect of the educational system by the “pigs” in charge. So imagine Animal Farm, with guns and machetes issued at the entrance. But issued only to some. For some animals are just more equal than others.

And welcome to the African full-violence version of Animal Farm! 100 Dead by politics in Mozambique during this crisis so far already. And this number is sure to climb if those two morons can’t sit down and work this out democratically.

Sardines and Sighting Maps

It has been a fantastic sardine run this memorable 2024. And all the action has been logged right here on The Sardine News. This year’s map has been viewed 199,000 times and just keeps growing.

Which led us to decide to keep the map live. And keep adding unique marine animal sightings and events. That occurs non-stop all year round. This year we started to log more whale and dolphin sightings. And we even had a shipwreck! And a freaking tornado! And recently a capsized KZNSB boat! We have been updating the map with recent catches too…

These events will from now on be included in the Sardine News Sightings Map for 2024. And on the 1 January 2025, we shall start all over again.

Here are the links to existing and past Sardine Sighting Maps. Great for a windy day like today to research. With instructions to install The Sardine News right on your phone or desktop.

2024 Sardine Map

2023 Sardine Map

2022 Sardine Map

2021 Sardine Map

Channels

Brucifire Surf Retorts – highly entertaining  surf reporting

Master Watermen – news from way down deep

The Sardine News – neva miss a single  sardine

FishBazaruto – 1000 pounds plus

MYDO Tackle Talk – highly technical  sport fishing

Surf Launching Southern Africa – getting out there safely

Water Woes – complain about your municipality here

Websites

umzimkulu.co.za – self-catering right on the Umzimkulu River
umzimkuluadrenalin.co.za –  will get you right out and onto the edge
thesardine.co.za – never miss a single sardine
masterwatermen.co.za – news from under water
fishbazaruto.com – dreams
brucifire.co.za – surf retorts

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